"Giving God the Honour and Glory that He deserves!"

My Early walk with God
->I struggled to commit to Christ: Giving God honor by obeying him, taking all opportunity to be closer to Him, putting Him in the second chair; Sometimes taking decisions into my own hands and grieving His heart at the same time.
->I struggled to commit to Church: Sometimes being late for meetings and missing events that I was not excited about because it was uncomfortable. With people, I did not make effort to know and build deeper relationships
->I struggled to commit to School: I didnt attend the classes, nor do some of the homework at times
->I struggled to commit to deep meaningful relationships: the pain and hurts that I experience through the unhealthy relationships with different people. Some of you's have heard of my stories about finding true friendships out there

The Past 2years
->Although there has been many struggles for those who know my experiences, personal battles, being misunderstood by many, struggle with studies, one time wanting to drop a degree and waiting on victories that didnt come soon enough. I began to commit to God more and trust in His goodness
->I began to serve Him with all my heart, sometimes I'd be down in darebin 5-6days a week, attending Kairos course after the church conference was a challenge because you would have been tired after 4 days of intensive sleepless nights of camp. The course condense in 4days compared to 2weeks.
->God is still good, he used myself (lorena+jeanneth) to connect to korean girl to HOPE Brisbane and in turn she bought many visitors; She stills attends lifegroup up there, met alot of new friends including visiting local Viet Christian guy who came from melbourne. It was tiring but God was at work
->All through this, God has been blessing me with success in studies, having great project partners one of them Christian, a strong student group team at latrobe, many salvations and personal growth
->No doubt at times, I ask God where is it all leading, all that I do, sometimes seemed not enough to see those victories. After my last exam and graduation, I applied to several jobs, there were number of rejections, number of those required relocation but alot of times my experience left me behind others cause I did not do summer internship rather helped out in church. I was tempted to apply to other states because there were more job prospect and seemed easier. Even a recent opportunity with Cadbury Schwepps, I thought I had good interview, but it turned out its not what they were looking for although i match all their criteria.

My learning
->I still Thank God for all the support, encouragement, prayers that people have given to God on my behalf. God is still good as always, He is faithful in all the pieces of jigsaw that He gives me; Although at times, confusing and frustrating not to see the bigger picture, I have and continue to learn to trust in God, put Him first, because He is faithful God

Deut 7:9 "Know therefore that the Lord your God, He is God, the faithful God, who keeps His convenant and His lovingkindness to a thousandth generations with those who love Him and keep His commandments"

->Loving and walking with God is beautiful, everything even though it may seem insignificant is perfect in His plans. I encourage everyone to put trust, faith and honor towards our God, our Lord Jesus.

Our victories are His, and His ours. On a side note, remember that local viet guy i mention about, I met him once and continue to contact him as he had a job opening down in melbourne. I contacted the company and thought initially no chance for me cause of my results, and also just before going on the midyear CCM camp and driving some folks to the campsite, I had interview 1hr before. After that, I didnt hear from them for a month as they were waiting for my transcript and graduation. Last week on monday I got a call, to ask when I can start work and if I can sign the agreement and bring it in. I will be heading into the office tomorrow at 8am! Praise God for His plan and providence, it is amazing how He works in brisbane and brings it down here to melbourne. He is faithful in all His promises. Amen!!

Shout to the Lord, is one of the first songs I heard before becoming a Christian....over two years back...standing at the doorway entrance of Kensington Community Center and hearing this song brought a stirring in my heart. Looking at the people worshiping God with their lifted hands and their voices. I felt a sense of peace and love that God impressed in my heart. I felt his strong presence. The only friend I knew from church did not come yet, so I stood there listening to the song...

"My comfort, my shelter, tower of refuge and stray. Let every breath, all that I am never cease to worship you....shout to the lord all the earth, power and majesty praise to the king. Mountains bow down and seas will roar at the sound of your name...I sing for joy at the works of your hands, forever I will love you, forever I will stand. Nothing compares to the promise I have in you..."

After the song i left and drove back, as I drove past the last train station that is near Kensington, I saw my friend walking towards church. He saw me and waved. I U-turned my car and picked him up,went back to church and did not turned back since then.

Although there has been many tribulations n trials some that men put before me, some from myself and many from God. The reason I have stood firm in church and persevered through it all is because of truth. The answer. The love. All accredited to my God.

He is my tower, refuge and fortress in times of trouble. He is my strength, power and hope when I am running. He is my all in all. He is my Lord Jesus. No matter what i have and would be facing, the crossroads and the circumstance. When I choose to prioritize God, to choose to do what is right although people would not understand. I have made it through clinging to the promises that he has given me. He is my provider, my protector, my healer, my strength, my wisdom and my God.

2.2yrs Ago part 4

07 September

Family love

Stop to think. On fathers day, HOPE, spoke to me. I admit, I have been distant from my father and sometimes frustrated for reasons. I blamed him for not having time to spend with us kids when we were younger, we did not have the intimacy that i shared with my mother. I can not remember a time he played sports with me, besides chess we did not have any other activites. However, I never stopped to think about the long hours he worked to make ends meet for the family. How he was tired after work and needed rest. He was our provider. How i undervalued him, even rebelled and importantly took for granted.

With my mothers passing, I also blamed him for the arguments with my mother that i tried to stop when i was younger. How he made my mother unhappy at those times. Whenever he spoke to me, i would answer with a sharp tongue from anger and frustration. i did not stop to think. How this made him feel.

Four things that we need to keep in mind:

-when a father is respected, the house is in order

-dont judge anyone, unless you yourself are judged

-love them freely with your heart

-let god be the judge

My mother, she was very motherly. My father, he was the man of the house. He disciplined us kids. Each time i did something wrong, I was afraid that he would punish me, sometimes i would hide and sometimes there is no way to hide. From this feeling, I really felt resentment of my dad, he was only there when i needed discipline i thought. Stopping to think now. I realise, who loves me more. A father who spoil me or a father who discipline me and taught me my values? Stop to think and you will see with your heart.

2.2 yrs Ago part 3

28 August

Speak with Life

Speak with life, love and compassion.

Think before you say something to someone you care about. When they are feeling miserable, dont condemn them, dont curse them, but speak with the heart of Jesus. Be compassionate, have empathy and dont say or find a reason why they deserve it. So instead of blaming, let us comfort him and speak to him with love and compassion.

Pastor Mark" Dont treat them like a rubbish bin, something you used everyday.. For example your parents, you blame them for something years ago they have done or said, accumulation of anger. Whenever they speak to you, for no reason you find it irratating and frustrating, so you say something mean. Think of how they would feel, think before you say something. Let prayer be in your heart before you speak"

Dara "Resolve your anger before the sunset, do not sin through anger and condemn yourself" - anger management

Eric "Live with a simple heart" - complexities of life

Jason "when hard time comes round, how you deal with it makes you a man"

2.2yrs Ago part 2

A week after that first entry

Recent thoughts

Gods hands directed me to care group which revealed many open hearted people which i thought ceased to exist. They made me think straight again, however some things still hasnt registered with me, only one thing that did get through is to believe in god, to prayer to him when i need help or thank god for what i have. He has plans for all of us, that is why he test's us to guide us to live a fellowship life as his childrens. Although i know i wont be a pastor or those christians who preach but i will be a person with open and kind heart.

Eric, the group leader of fusion, ask us a question "where do u see yourself in 5 years, if you see yourself like this in 5years how would u feel? Would you feel you have wasted time?" Although these words have great impact, i feel only a twinge of feeling, a movement might be but it settles. I dont know if i care about anything anymore, all i know now is to seek help from divinve intervention and hope god gives me strength and guide me through his hand on the right path.

2.2yrs Ago part 1

This was written two years ago, during one of the first caregroup I attended before becoming a Christian. There were two brothers who shared to me passionately until 12am at times...these people have impacted my life and has shown me the way to Jesus. I thank them.

What is the most valueable thing you want to have?

What is the most valueable thing you would hold onto when you face death? What with the possession and material, all these will become meaningless. Your body will eventually be gone and memories of you may linger for awhile. The answer I was given, is the relationship with god will last eternally. I dont completely understand this but hope you and I may ponder at this thought for one more moment.

Eric "God does not want to hurt us, because when we hurt, god hurts much more and cries in pain. He does things that we do not understand, to show us his way of living. To teach us a valueable lesson, either because our pride is to high or we are selfish. God is like our father, only wanting best for his children"

Tek "We separate god only through a thin margin, if we cried out to god and ask him for help and forgiveness, we will be closer to him. We will be comforted and looked after through gods hands."

Jason zhang friend of a friend says "Sometimes we're holding onto something of the past and cannot move on. They say let it go but it is too difficult when that person is you. and memories are such tricky things that sometimes it feels like only yesterday, not months or years ago. but without memory, without tears or joy one is not complete. for yesterday is but a dream
and tomorrow is only a vision only today well lived makes ever"